Sometimes I wonder what life was like 200 years ago when we didn't have all of these diseases we had today. If you would've told someone they had GERD in the 1800's they'd looked at you funny and said,"You mean a herd of geese? That's a gaggle not a gerd." Back in those days they gave em a drink of whisky and sent them on their way. Nowadays I get to go in to the hospital for chronic heartburn. This morning I was a wreck. I have a tendency to get myself worked up over going to the hospital. The internet surely doesn't help when you know too much about what their going to do with the endoscopy. So after I got seated in the waiting room I started worrying. It only increased as I got put in the pre-surgery room. The nurse lady was really nice. I think she was one of those people who was really happy with their jobs. It doesn't make sense when a teller at McDonald's is just too happy to serve you, but a nurse I can see. I was given an IV and had to wait for about an hour. Then they pulled me into the operating room. I recognized the gastro doc who gave me the consult to get the procedure done. They then said I would feel sleepy. Then he had me put this tube in my mouth. Then they jammed a tube down my throat. I started gagging and actually reached my arm out take the thing out. I think a nurse actually sat on my arm and the doctor says,"he's nervous give him more demoral and vecicet". I heard a nurse say,"relax". Then I am shook awake. I look around thinking I must've stopped them from doing the surgery. I was like, man now I have to go through this again. Reality is I was asleep and they had done the surgery. Why couldn't they have given me the right amount before they shoved that tube in my mouth? Apparently they took some biopsies of my stomach and the nurse said I had gastritis. Can you have gastritis for 4 years? I won't get the formal results until the end of this month. Once I found out it was over I was so relieved. Imagine getting worked up over just 1 minute of displeasure. I should quit surfing, who knows what I might find next. I can't even remember what life was like before the internet. Wait, oh yeah. We had something called "encyclopedias". Do they make those anymore?

Thought of the Day
Lloyd (Jim Carrey): That's a lovely accent you have there... New Jersey?
Bus stop beauty (Lisa Stothard): Austria.
Lloyd: Austria! Well then... gooday mate! Let's put another shrimp on the barbie.
-- Dumb and Dumber